Huge blog (5days later)

I can't even decide where I want to start this blog, I feel like I have so much to say....I guess I'll start with work...

Thursday was a good day, everyone is so nice, its great when everyone has a nice demeanor honestly...so it was good learned how to close, easy enough...
Friday was my first day on my own closing, it was fine a little busy, pretty easy, so it was overall pretty good, until I felt completely overwhelmed when I got home, I don't even know why...I just felt really stressed out for some unknown reason..
Saturday wasn't the best honestly...I had to get up early to go take a test before opening at work, I had to rush through my final exam (thankfully I passed the class), I got to work almost late but I wasn't :), I'm sure you see where this is going, it was a very slow day, I had to go restock the chips after we opened so I had to put the little sign up. Before work I got a huge coffee with a shot of espresso hoping that'd do the trick and keep me semi alive, but by the time 1 came around I had to pee so bad, I was trying to hold it until the other girl got there but I couldn't so I had to put up the sign again, I felt really guilty, and like I said it was slow so it wasn't the best day..
Sunday was a good day overall, I closed again, it was pretty slow too but I had more to do, I had to put up the promo jewelry so it kept me busy, and I had a couple customers but still not enough..
Its funny though there was a guy who came in on Saturday to buy some flowers, and he stopped in on Sunday and called me his girlfriend (cute right?) haha he was older I thought it was pretty funny, then I had a pervy come in and say something along the lines of "if you were my nurse i'd..." and I kind of blocked out anything he said after that although it was funny, I just remotely laughed it off typical me...and then I had a guy walk by (we are located right in the front of the hospital entrance) I smile at everyone that walks by, just because, lol but anyways the guy walks by and walks back just to say "you have a very nice smile" it was really nice of him...kind of made my week? lol.

Work has totally "turned me on" to cold play, we listen to the two radio stations that play a mix of music, and all weekend I heard cold play (the music keeps me sane on slow days) but the lyrics just have stuck so I have been listening to cold play frequently which isn't usually my forte but the lyrics are really...I don't even think I could describe it, just nice, and its like relaxing music anyways...

I finished the first Fifty Shades Of Grey, I teared up at the end, it was the like the total reality of how it is with men and women's mentalities...but anyways I am now reading Fifty Shades Darker, the second book, and I am actually anxious to read it tonight, ugh am I really finding an escape of my own reality though this book? I am assuming so hahah.

Is it luck, fate, both, or neither?


Yesterday I was talking to a friend about life...and I am a firm believer in 'everything happens for a reason', 'good things happen to those who wait', and of course 'fate will bring you to your destiny'...he completely disregarded all of things I said in what I believe...but its the reality of it...when someone tells me a story or I hear a story about how they decided not to go somewhere and something bad ended up happening, or someone goes somewhere and meets someone unexpectedly, for some reason I just know we have a plan whether or not it is completely mapped out so to speak, or if it just happens to build up in the moment, obviously I don't know but its weird how things work, its weird that we don't get a job we really wanted, but eventually we find a job (or whatever it is) that is absolutely perfect...or how we feel like we love someone who feels completely opposite...and eventually when you meet the right person both feelings are mutual...its weird thats why I say everything happens for a reason, good things happen for a reason, and fate will bring us to our destiny..thats why I try not to dwell on falling in love, or anything anymore if its in my plan, or meant to be it will be...despite everything. And I do believe in some sort of luck but I haven't quite figured that out at all..haha.

I can never get over how people think its completely OK to abuse financial assistance either, I know this a completely different out of no where topic, but really...People actually work hard for their money while others get it for free, I understand if you are disabled, but if you just chose not to bite the bullet and find a job there is a problem...sometimes you have to sacrifice it all or nothing especially if you have a family, and a home, getting two part time jobs is possible sometimes there are dead end jobs I get that, but also sometimes there are things you have to do like swallow your pride so you don't have to abuse the system, I mean really...usually the people that sacrifice things end up with some sort of light at the end of the tunnel, aka a miracle, and of course sometimes not...which leads me to another point one time I thought about the old famous 'why do good things happen to bad people'...but I came to the conclusion if its over subjective things, objects, men etc...they're all easy to grasp if I wanted it bad enough I'd have what the 'bad' people have as well...but sometimes people have higher standards then others and better things going for them to worry about trying to get what others have...I don't even know where I am going with this, let alone if it will even make any sense but whatever lol..


I'm going to end the blog here...hopefully i'll blog more the next few days since I don't have to work for a few days!!! leaving you with some cold play encouragement "lights will guide you home" "could it be worse", probably the best question to ask yourself when things are tough, "you don't know how lovely you are", "lets go back to the start", "nobody said it was easy", as you can see I only used two songs but..anyways maybe one of these will relate to you, encourage you, or make your day. :)

Sinking In

I am beginning to feel extremely overwhelmed, nervous, and anxious all at once...Tomorrow is my last day accompanied by anyone at work...then its just me Friday, and Saturday :/ I am nervous I will mess up, forget something, or not know how to properly do a transaction on gift cards...so tomorrow is my day to get every last bit in, I won't be with the manager, and I only have 3 hours tomorrow to get it all..ugh I am anxious to get Friday done and over with...just so I feel comfortable Saturday, I learned more today, and I felt like I did better...Friday is a 6 hour shift, I will probably be on the phone with the manager a good percentage of the time just so I make sure I am doing everything accurately, on another note...Saturday is a 3 hour shift, :) AND opening is easy so I shouldn't have any problems..or I hope not...this is a job, and if I mess up it could be the end of it, I am not trying to think negatively at all but sometimes it is just so hard to keep positive when you are feeling all of these things at once, but I am keeping my composure and staying as positive as I can...I will be praying tonight that everything goes smoothly for Friday and Saturday, and I need to finish getting all of my shifts written down because I may just be working Sunday too, for all I know lol...
It is exciting though knowing I am learning so much in a two-three day increment, I feel proud of myself just because I can properly run a register, clock in clock out, I know the rules, cashing in cashing out, the different methods we have, and of course getting used to all of the items, and prices, oh and where everything is located.. AND I only have 5 chapters left of Fifty Shades, Im kind of sad about that, my grandma is reading the second one so I have to wait to read it :/...I still really like the book though lol...but yeah I guess thats it, I may not blog tomorrow depending on how I feel I have a busy day, I have a test at 2 a final at 2:30, work 5-8:30, and by then I may just be ready to pass out, or maybe not, OH and I have been wearing the worst shoes possible so my feet have been hurting, but I went swimming and relaxed in the pool it actually helped my whole body feel relaxed and semi-normal, if you've never had a job standing for several hours you probably won't understand, I know I will get used to it eventually, but for now its painful, and its not actually painful during at all like I have no NEED to sit, but when Im done and I actually sit down I can feel how worn out my body is, and my feet hurt after...and I am completely ok with this...


Sometimes it is hard to be positive, but positivity makes situations a WHOLE lot better, taking a few minutes and praying also helps. Cheers with my invisible drink to staying positive even when it is really hard.

The First Day

I didn't toss and turn all night long like I expected which is a relief, I woke up at 7am, got ready and left my house at 8:10am and got to work (haha) at 8:20am so I was a little early, I waited for the manager she got there, and she showed me all of the basics, cashing in/clocking in/where everything is etc. it was pretty easy today, a lot of different people, and a lot of information to learn in one day I think that exhausted me more than the initial work, and standing for 6hours..She is so nice, and understanding, she helped me get the gist of everything and we only have a few more things to run through tomorrow, although there are a few things I want to go over tomorrow just to make sure I am prepared, she would like me to work Friday night alone..ehh I'm ok with it as long as I can get the hang of everything, and thursday night I am working with other co-workers so I can learn how to close, I am kind of nervous to be on my own, but excited at the same, speaking of nervous I wasn't nervous at all today really, or at least not much...easy-peasy, hahaha now for a shower, fifty shades, and sleep, one more early morning of training or at least I hope so, although I dont mind it at all :).

Practice makes perfect, soon enough I'll be a pro right?(lol) and she also said the KEY to the cash register is to take your time, exactly patience, like I mentioned yesterday..:)

Dreams Can Become A Reality, OR Just Pure Coincidence

TWO BLOGS IN ONE DAY!?!

haha yep...I think the title is an automatic give away if you happened to read my last blog...I got the job! (just like my dream I had last night, except it was the call not e-mail haha, so weird) And I start tomorrow...at 8:30am training I assume lol...so hopefully everything goes good, and I don't get too nervous, after I got the call I felt completely nervous, it was kind of pathetic...lol but I think I was just shocked and overwhelmed, you know?? because about 20 minutes later I just felt normal, and I don't really feel nervous now, I'm sure it won't kick in until I am about to go to sleep and I'll be tossing and turning, or until I am driving there..My first REAL REAL job..haha, I am so relived though, after a week of anticipating this call..finally right? now I won't have to talk about that all the time, hopefully I'll have some good stories once I start..Basically I am a Sales Associate at a gift shop at a hospital, and if you didn't read any blogs prior to this one, I have been wanting a job in the hospital for quite sometime since I am going to school to become an RT. Anyways as I said in my last blog this morning was a one in a million that I actually enjoyed getting up, so I guess I'm going to have to get used to getting up early for the week, hopefully just the week the manager who interviewed me said I'd be working evenings so...thats why I said hopefully lol.. anyways on a different note, I read two more chapters from Fifty Shades, and I am going to read some more soon, to help me calm down and hopefully put me to sleep so I can fall asleep without all of the tossing and turning, but I'm sure it won't work like that hahaha..but I guess I'll blog about my first day tomorrow :), I kind of feel like its going to be like the first day of school (grade school) you know the anxious feeling you get when you want to know if you're going to like the teacher(s), let alone the class...although I don't feel that way in college, so maybe I have out grown that or maybe its just different? haha, anyways I better get to the reading before it gets too late!!!


Patience is all it takes sometimes, dwelling, doubting, and worrying can leave you bitter, insecure, and unsure, it's better to just go with the flow if it is meant to be, it will be...if not there are better things out there for you, whether this applies to a job you're waiting to hear back about, the person you feel is the one, or just any everyday event that makes you feel impatient, be patient, and maybe you will be surprised when it actually happens, or a better opportunity will arise as you wait, and not dwell, doubt, or worry. :) 

Early Mornings..

Where do I even begin? I mean honestly I woke up early to sign up for the two classes that I can take, Bio and int. algebra...So I had this idea in my head that I would get the classes I wanted, word to the wise never PLAN on getting what you want when your college thinks its a good idea to let new students, and students with more than 30 credits to pick their classes before you, yes you the one who has been in college for almost a year now...ok so I am referring to myself you caught me clearly, but I will never plan on that again, I knew logically the online math I wanted was full, and I probably wouldn't get it, but last night I checked to make sure the Wednesday Bio was still available and it was...oh these morning critters (HAHAHA) got to it before I could...but you know everything happens for a reason and I am well aware I mention this in almost every single blog but it is in fact true, so it comes down to this... the Bio I wanted was full, and it was easy to pick another bio with a decent teacher, a warm thank you to ratemyprofessor.com I couldn't have picked one without you, lol seriously though I looked at probably 5-8 different professors available for two days a week around my schedule (although I don't really have much of a schedule -sighs-) and I picked the highest ranked one :) oh and yes it was available..haha so the hard part was finding a math professor I knew what I wanted, I wanted a class that  was one day a week, anytime really, and only used the program I like, its called Aleks incase you were wondering...lol but I found the perfect class and the professor got a pretty good rank, OH and by the way getting back to the 'everything happens for a reason' my mom who was lucky enough to sign up for classes last Monday, got the online int. algebra, so I was looking at it and it doesn't even use the program I like, Spring semester I failed a math class because it didn't have this specific program that I used with the first math I took in college, it helps out a lot honestly, so when I took the math in Spring it was like everything was completely foreign to me although math usually seems to be pretty foreign anyways but what a blessing in disguise right? I am actually pretty satisfied with the classes I have chosen :) so far at least... hahaha.. aside from the fact the that both classes are almost three hours long haha, and this is the first time I won't be taking any classes solely online, yikes.

So on a different note, I had a dream last night...that I got an e-mail from the job. Let me fill you in...I didn't give them my e-mail haha, it didn't ask.. but anyways so I got an e-mail saying I got the job blahblahblah, maybe this is a sign? maybe today they will call? or maybe the idea is still just chilling in the back of my mind hoping, but who knows...maybe she will call maybe she won't call.

On a different, different, note lol...I just finished my macadamia nut coffee, yes I had to mention specifically what kind, only because I talked about this coffee previously..but my day is going to consist of math homework, OH this is the last week of summer term incase I failed to mention this prior to now lol, I have my last chapter test, and my final this week? (I just looked at the calendar to check) yep its definitely this week, ugh so crammed but at least it will be over with right?, so I'll be doing that, and probably a pre-test (I know I can't seem to stay away from these, I just love them so much -sarcasm) and I will probably relax in bed afterwards and continue reading Fifty Shades...I feel so fancy abbreviating it like that ;) I am on chapter 14, which I think is half way through the first book, clearly its keeping my attention, and also my mind off of other things that I don't need to stress about!


~I am not much of a morning person, but I actually didn't mind getting up so early this morning, probably a one in a million kind of morning for me haha literally though, I am going to keep searching for my Mr.Grey, and I am going to continue to rely on hope, and knowing everything happens for a reason, as if I don't mention this everyday but honestly I am going to break if I don't find out about that job..soon, real soon.

Fifty shades of what??

Yes I finally gave in, and just started reading Fifty Shades Of Grey, last night..I like it honestly so far it is exactly this (in my opinion): an adult twist of Twilight, and porn. I imagine before the internet, and prior to dvds/vhs porn people read things of this nature...I am not at the crazy part yet either though maybe crazy isn't the word 'exotic' or 'kinky' right up my alley hahaha, so I mean hey if you enjoy reading something along those lines go for it, I like it just because I find it interesting, but then again I find anything interesting if it isn't involving me currently :/...and two pluses; #1 I haven't read a book for pleasure since 9th grade which happened to be Twilight, and #2 it gets me sleepy so its perfect for me right now since I have to get up early tomorrow to sign up for my classes so I get what I want..I know I know its joyful waking up at 7:30am :) haha..


Wishing I could meet a Mr.Grey right about now...handsome, knows how to please a woman, and rich in that case I wouldn't have to dwell on hearing back about this job, just kidding I really want this job, high hopes, sticking with my prayer, and wishful thinking...what a Sunday night back to reading this wonderful, pornified, shady book, oh and on another note, this is helping with my typical insomnia (I usually don't fall asleep until 2:30-3:00am, woohoo!) hahaha.

News, Diet vacay, Cheap at home beauty tips...

First off I want to say my thoughts and prayers are with anyone that was affected by the Aurora tragedy.


NEWS, I actually see why some people are so fearful of our world, the news constantly puts out the reality of the things that are going on in our world, but at the same time it can definitely affect some people who are fearful...some of the most joyful things we can do in our lives, or just the things we do on an everyday basis can all be changed in a second..I know we all know this but hearing it everyday on the news doesn't help, and I am actually just really realizing how petrifying the reality of it is, I wish  we didn't have news, just a local channel with weather, traffic, and local events or something along those lines (aka a perfect world lol) I know this will never happen and we have the choice to either or watch or not watch, but yesterday as I flipped through all of the channels it seemed like everywhere this was talked about, does it bother me? no...but what are the odds of someone who is fearful finding this and never wanting to go the movies now, never go on an airplane, never go to a college, a high school, on a ride, drive their car etc...anyways it just got me thinking, I mean the news is great to keep us informed, but even if I was to avoid watching the news for one week, if I log into my email (MSN) the news is there, or even on a social network...I don't know where I am going with this hahah. :)

Diet vacation?, yes I am on a diet vacation, my vacation ends tomorrow, and no I didn't over indulge or anything crazy, a few weeks back I read about a guy who lost weight would take little breaks so he wouldn't get too worn out of the same routine, so that is what I did! I haven't calculated my calories, or did my usual exercising, I just gave myself a mini vacay and I felt like I needed it most this week, with all of the stress from school, to STILL not hearing about this job, I know that doesn't sound like much stress lol but it is for me, well kind of...

Cheap at home beauty tips
I figured I'd talk about my four favorite at home beauty tips (most of the things are found around ones home)

Honey, and sugar scrub-
pretty self explanatory lol
-a little under 1/4 a cup of white sugar
-a teaspoon of honey
-AND you can add a little face wash or soap to it if needed
mix them together and scrub away, it always leaves my face super soft, nice, and exfoliated!


The baby powder trick-
Most people probably know about this if you run out of dry shampoo, or have an oily scalp you can take a little baby powder and rub it in to your roots and it absorbs the oil :).

Mixing nail polish-
This is also one that is common, mixing white nail polish with colors to make it more of a pastel, or lighter color..
all you need is white nail polish, another color, an old nail polish brush, and something to mix the two colors on (an old lid, or old Tupperware)
mix away and you have yourself a new color (especially right now pastels, and brights are in)

Wash away that chlorine-
Lol I may be the only person that feels like chlorine lingers in my hair even after I rinse and repeat in the shower after swimming, I googled and googled and I came across this easy step..add BAKING POWDER to your shampoo evidently it helps do something with the PH level, you can google it if you'd like but I tried it and I don't smell the chlorine smell I usually do which is a plus hahah!